When I think of drama, I immediately label it has an unnecessary use of perfectly good energy used on something that is pointless. While it may be enjoyable for television audiences to watch reality television in which drama is the constant attraction, it is not a component of living a simply luxurious life. And in fact, it contradicts the entire notion of living simply because drama, quite frankly, complicates.
For whatever reason, there are people in this world who love drama. Just as the plot structure of a novel careens upward, it seems to be a natural high that is created by unnecessarily stirring up mischief in one’s personal life in hopes of bring more satisfaction. I’ve never understood the logic behind this. How would tearing something down ever help build something up?
Needless to say, it takes those of us with patience, perspective, maturity and fortitude to not fall prey to the drama queens/kings that want to draw us into their net. The difficult part is that it can be quite easy to step into unnecessary drama if we aren’t consciously aware of who we are interacting with, who we are opening up to and aren’t cognizant of what really is a matter to attend to and what we should simply walk away from.
Life offers us so many opportunities and ways to enrich our lives, deepen relationships and continue to grow as individuals, but it requires a clear focus of knowing what we want, to then be able to discern what will not help us create such a life of beauty, serenity and simplicity.
So in an effort to prevent involving yourself in unnecessary drama so that you can instead focus on what is truly important, I’ve gathered together ten pieces of advice to keep in mind as you navigate and interact with a variety of all sorts of different people.
1. Strong, trustworthy friendships take time. Be patient. Just because someone’s willing to listen, doesn’t mean you need to spill the beans.
2. Remove yourself from other people’s drama. If it doesn’t involve you, step away.
3. Be honest. One of my favorite Mark Twain quotes, “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”
4. Keep your promises. If we vow to keep our promises, we also become more aware of what we promise and how often. Be sure whatever you offer or whatever you say you’ll do is something you can actually do. Often we want to do what we promise, but then reality sets in. Live consciously, and know for certain before you speak.
5. Don’t feed the gossip monster. In other words, let the any gossip you may hear stop with you. Don’t continue the cycle and share it with someone else. In fact, be clear to those around you that you don’t want to get involved with conversations that contain gossip. Eventually, they’ll realize you’re serious and you won’t have to ask anymore.
6. Learn how to communicate effectively. The root of drama is often the inability to communicate properly which means with respect, face to face, with honesty and in a timely manner. When we know better, we need to choose to do better.
7. Understand the abilities of social media. Simply put – always post anything on the internet with the understanding that it is public and will live forever. If you wouldn’t want the world to see how you behave or how you really feel, then don’t share it using social media.
8. Limit your use of social media. Facebook and many other social media platforms make it easy to peruse other people’s pages to see what they are up to without them knowing. Instead of being someone who engages in this, choose to focus on your own life (if you’re lurking, you most likely have too much time on your hands that could easily allow you to do something much more productive), decide instead to stay in touch with people via face-to-face meetings or over the phone. Those people who make time in lives to spend time together are the people we should spend time involving ourselves with, not people who are our supposed “friends”.
9. Walk away and don’t engage. If a situation erupts that is causing people to not act appropriately or in a manner which is unbecoming, walk away. Unless children, animals or innocent victims are involved, walk away. Don’t engage in situations that are volatile because you never know how you may be dragged into it by simply hanging around or trying to stop it. The people that choose to create the situations are adults (even though they may be behaving as such), and therefore, they can deal with whatever takes place.
10. Ignore the grapevine Similar to #5, make a conscious decision to ignore what may come your way via the local gossip wheel. I genuinely believe that for some people gossip is their form of entertainment because they haven’t discovered another way to entertain themselves. If they only realized there is so many other worthwhile and productive things they could be doing, we would all be better off, but we can’t control them. We can only control our own behavior, so choose to ignore and put a stop to any gossip that you may encounter.
Author: Shannon Ables Photo: Pinterest
